Wednesday, May 13, 2009


My wife's phone chirped the "you have a text" tone at 2 AM.

She doesn't get a lot of texts and the sound was unfamiliar. We both woke up saying "what is that?"

It was Oldest Son updating his twitter and she, being new to twitter and not expecting tweets in the middle of the night, left her phone on. Oldest son is introducing a new generation to twitter. My Dad, his Aunt, his mother.....

Now she had to get it.

She read out loud that he was on a bus to the Milan train station. Actually he twittered (is that a real verb?) "After some struggle we made it to the bus and we are headed into milano".

Struggle? What sort of struggle? armed? Linguistic? Gypsy Children?

I'm not sure I like getting ambiguous "tweets" in the middle of the night.

She is more concerned with the 50 cents a "tweet" and and wants to tell him that he should only report in next when he gets to the farm. What she wants to tweet is "@oldestson Please only update us when you arrive at the farm"

But it's the middle of the night, she doesn't text much and it comes out as a terse message on her twitter directed at no one in particular:

"to the farm".

??? "to the farm" ??? what does that even mean? The only proper response is "si".

I'm torn between the ka-ching of the 50 cents per update and having more breadcrumbs on the trail. I'll pay the 50 cents, tell me what's going on. Please tell me what was the struggle?

Now I can't sleep. I see a swarm of Gypsy Children rushing up to the two of them at the Milan (milano?) train station and striping them of every valuable faster than piranha.

I'm thinking I should text to him "Don't take the baby from the Gypsy Children" - because that's how they get you. You take the baby as they throw it on you and then when your hands are full and take everything.


I think better of it, realizing that "to the farm" followed by "don't take the baby" are clearly the rantings of crazy people.

An hour later and I'm still tossing and turning. There have been no updates. I'm convinced it's because the Gypsy Children have his phone and right now are calling Nicaragua, charging monstrous amounts to our cell phone bill. Of course, in the light of day, Gypsy children calling Nicaragua makes absolutely no sense, but in the darkness of tossing and turning it made perfect sense.

Those nasty Gypsy Children.

I get up to watch a little TV to take my mind off things and maybe disengage.

I'm scrolling through the late night TV selection when I come to Showtime where Hostel II is on.

I think I'll pass.

If I'm making up things to worry about, having vivid imagery of dismembered young people traveling around Europe certainly isn't going to help.

Eventually I went back to sleep and in the morning there were many more tweets reassuring us that he had not been abducted by Gypsys.

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