Wednesday, July 26, 2006

Pimp my ride.

Last week I was coming home from work and after getting in my broiling car at the train station I pressed the down button on the drivers side power window only to have it go 3/4 ths of the way down and make a horrible crunching sound.

Great, just another thing wrong with my car.

I can't complain, the '3' mobile is nearly ten years old even though I've only owned it for 8. I am pretty hard on cars so in "dog" years that is more like 56. Most cars I've owned headed for the junk yard at the end of my term of ownership. This includes the first car my wife bought new, a 1985 SR5 that I ran out of oil in '95. It wasn't my fault. I still think the kids next door stole the oil.

I call my current vehicle the '3' mobile since that is one of the two speeds that work on the AC/Heat fan out of four. One and Two died sometime over the winter and the funny part was that it took me nearly a month to figure out that the fan wasn't blowing. I remember thinking how cold it was by my feet when usually it was toasty warm.

The muffler went sometime in spring. At first it was a quiet low rumble that you could hardly hear. Now, well now I'm afraid to take it to parking garages for the looks I might get.

Now between the muffler and the whistling from the not-quite-closed drivers window, I am going deaf.

It needs tires. It has dings in the doors from the tight free parking at the PATCO station. It's beat.

I need to get on Pimp My Ride. I can scream and jump up and down like a idiot when rap superstar and car enthusiast Xzibit reveals my new wheels. Ohhh! I can't believe it! Is that my car?

It could have ridiculous features that I will use once like wireless internet or a place where back packs are shot out of like a canon when I go back packing. Or how about Xbox. I don't even like Xbox but if they want to put in, have at it. How about a big screen TV in my civic.

I also think that an even better show would be to revisit previous winners of "Pimp my ride" and see what they have done with the custom vehicles they were given. My bet is that they either sold them or they look more like the trashed version. I mean where do you keep a car with 15 televisions in it? On the street? come on.

Old habits die hard. If you mistreated the first car, having new wheels on it doesn't mean you are suddenly going to become the guy that parks at the out reaches of the parking lot taking up five spots so no one parks near you. If you never vacuumed the first one you are never going to vacuum the custom one. (I recently vacuumed my car only because I left it opened and it rained in it).

I've also noticed that as that show gets older the contestants get less and less enthusiastic. At first you would have though they won the lottery but now it seems they are still excited but not quite at the same peak as before.

On second thought maybe I'm just more comfortable with vice grips holding up my driver's side window.

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